Every once in a while, I lift my head out of my self-absorbed teenage angst long enough to catch a glimpse of the good stuff that I’m swimming in. I guess it’s all a matter of perspective.
I spent a year “living grateful” which has overflowed past that one year and injected itself into the ethos of my mind. In spite of that, it seems that old habits sometimes die hard. Especially when I’m tired or worn out, my eyes waiver in their commitment to a horizon of good. I start to focus on the “don’ts” and the “nots.”
As in, “I don’t have these things that I want.”
“I’m not this thing that I wish that I were.”
This weekend, in spite of the fact that it was full and busy (circumstances that usually make for a one way ticket out of living-grateful-land), I became reacquainted with the Sarah who lives grateful… And I like her. A lot.
Suddenly my sight was realigned and I could see the beautiful things.
- Singing songs that make me feel alive.
- Sitting alone on my back porch with an adult beverage and my journal, listening to the crickets.
- Those first waking moments after a full night of sleep (which rarely happens for a girl who suffers from severe insomnia).
- Watching people fall in love.
- Finding the perfect gift to randomly give a good friend to remind them that they’re important and special and wonderful.
- Writing a new song.
- Seeing a new spark of joy in an old friend who has been in a dark place for a long time.
- Realizing that the stray cat who has been hanging around has officially adopted us—he came in the house when I opened the door and then he let me pick him up. (Although next time, he probably won’t let me pick him up since I put him right back outside.)
- Rediscovering an achingly sweet, aurally lush album that I’d forgotten about. Check out “One Cell in the Sea” by A Fine Frenzy.