There are some distinct advantages to being a rock star. I did a search on the internet of “rock star perks” and got some pretty hairy results.
- Do all the drugs you want.
Of course, that would come with the territory. My drugs of choice (outside of cephalexin) are coffee and chocolate. Not quite as hard core as say… Courtney Love’s drugs of choice… but a close second.
- Sleep with whomever you please.
The Sarah Mac Band might differ from other rock stars on this one…
First of all, Charlie doesn’t get to sleep with just anyone. He’s married and he’s a one woman man. Plus, he kind of HAS to sleep with his wife because she’s the only one who will deal with his snoring. In fact, the first time that Claire, Charlie and I all shared a hotel room, even Claire pulled the diva card and made Charlie go out and buy us earplugs the next day. (Those are the kind of moments—when Claire is the one pulling the diva card—that make me believe that all is right with the world.)
When Claire and I lived together in college, she still slept with a teddy bear that she had left over from her childhood. He was on his last leg back then, but probably five years later, I helped her out restuff him to compensate for the “guts” that he’d lost over the years and then sewed him back up. I asked her for permission before I published her bed buddy on the interwebs for God and everyone to read about. She said, “Yes, you can blog about it… but for the record, I don’t sleep with him anymore.” (Yeah, right… old habits die hard.)
I, unfortunately suffer from sever insomnia, so I don’t sleep at all…much less with someone. I did, however, have two nights of full-complete-all-the-way-through-the-night sleep a few weeks ago. In fact, the next morning when I passed Housemate in the kitchen at the coffee maker, I asked, “Did I wake you up last night walking aimlessly around the floor above your bedroom as you tried to sleep?” Because we were both just starting on the coffee at that point, I only got a noncommittal mumble. That was really all I needed as an opening: “TRICK QUESTION, HOUSEMATE! I wasn’t awake all night walking around aimlessly above your bedroom! I was fast asleep in MY BED! ALL NIGHT LONG!!” Then Housemate walked away and I drank the rest of the pot of coffee by myself, which probably contributed to my insomnia that evening.
And my all time favorite perk of being a rock star as reported by multiple reliable sources on the interwebs…
- Die as much as you want.
Rock starts go big and go fast. Think about it. Janis Joplin, Jimi Henndrix, Kurt Cobain, Jeff Buckley, Sid Vicious, Elliott Smith. And although we’re not so much the dying sort—I am sort of strangely acquainted with death to the point that Claire calls me “Six-Feet-Under Girl.”
It’s not uncommon when we’re packing up on the way out of town for me to be really uneasy and say, “okay guys, I just want to let you know that I have a bad feeling about this trip… I think that this might be the one where we get into a wreck and die.”
I didn’t realize until the last time that we went out of town when I told Charlie and he said, “You say that every time, Sarah.” Then when Claire got there and asked what was wrong, I said again, “I just have a really bad feeling about this trip. I think that this is it for us. This is the one where we’re going to get in a really bad car wreck and die.” In typical Claire fashion, she just kind of shrugged and said, “Yeah, but you do realize that you say this every time? We haven’t died yet.”
For the Sarah Mac Band brand of rock-stardom (which is more the low level local type), there are other perks. A little less flashy, a little slower pace… a little more my style.
For example, I get to meet and greet and get to be friends with other rocks stars. Like for real friends—like go to their birthday parties, get introduced to their kids and have their personal cell phone numbers. Just last week, it seems for various reasons, I ended up talking to Grant Peeples (on his personal cell phone) like twelve times. Okay, that might be an exaggeration… but we did end up talking several times. Some times scheming about how to take over the world… Sometimes talking about some songs that we’re going to do together. And once, he even called to check up on me after he heard about my losing battle with strep throat.
So it was only natural when a short while back, I noticed while checking the stats of my blog (which I tend to do in a manner closely resembling an obsessive-compulsive tendency) that someone had used the search term “grant peeples married?” to find my blog. The first thing I did was go to Google and use the term “grant peeples married?” to see what rabbit trail someone took on that search to find my blog. The second thing I did was email Grant and say, “This is a search term that someone used to scour the internet to ultimately find my blog. That’s cool that people are reading my blog… but, Grant…OH MY GOSH!! SOMEONE IS TOTALLY CREEPING ON YOU TO FIND OUT IF YOU’RE MARRIED OR NOT, YOU STUD!!”
“Creeps up like them Fruit of the Loom shorts you can buy up to the WalMart for five dollars a dozen.
I’m a confessed married person.
Here’s my thang on “blogs.”
I want them sent to me.
In my mailbox.
I don’t know an RS feed from a Flint River Mills feedbag.
I’d love to read you regularly ‘cause you are so witty and shit. But what do I have to do to get the blog in my inbox?”
That’s how he writes, too… each thought on a separate line. Well… at least in emails. He doesn’t write his blog like that. I’m linking here to a particularly funny posting on Grant’s blog about singing at a homeless man’s funeral. Claire read this out loud to Charlie and me one time while we were traveling. I think that she was trying to alleviate the tension that I was pumping out into the air because I was sure that we were going to die in a car wreck on that trip. Alas, because we were laughing so hard that Claire started crying and Charlie started hyperventilating (at the same time as driving at high speeds on the freeway), we almost did die. Then Grant would have had to sing at my funeral—which I have already informed my parents that I would like to happen in the event that I should meet my untimely end and they have to figure out what to do with me.
Because of Grant, I posed the question to Claire, “How exactly does one get our blog delivered straight to their inbox?” She took a long deep breath, as she always does when beginning an attempt at explaining something technological, and began in her best teacher voice: “They would ‘subscribe’ to it. And… Hmmm….. Actually, you know what? Don’t worry about figuring out how to tell people to do that. I’ll take care of it.”
Later, she sent me an email saying, “I’ve just made a little box at the top right hand corner of the blog so that people can plug in their email address and it will automatically subscribe them to the blog, delivering it to their inbox every time you or one of us post something.”
Way to go Superclaire! Sometimes I can’t even figure out how to access my email and she’s coding little blog sign-up boxes and embedding them into our blog. Man, even if she loses both hands in a tragic chain-saw accident and can’t play bass anymore, she’ll still be in the band as a technical advisor.
If like Grant, you’d like to receive our blog in your email inbox every time we write one (and I promise that unless the rapture is coming, I don’t blog more than once a week) then please use this opportunity to scroll up now to the top of this page and enter your email into the little box on the top right of the page. That should do the trick.
Another example of getting to be pals with other rock stars occurred this week. I was in Colorado at the Telluride Bluegrass Festival last week when I ran into none other than Carmela of Sarasota-based Radio-Free Carmela and the Transmitters. The cool part is that Carmela told the people in her party, “Oh my gosh, this is Sarah Mac from the Sarah Mac Band! We’re playing a gig with her next week in Sarasota.” She had to yell it to be heard over the music because we were pretty close to the stage and the music was blaring. Because she was yelling, all of the people around us heard and looked at me with a new respect, making a little more room for me as I threw elbows to get closer to Futureman who was standing on the other side of the fence that separated the common people (a category that low level local rock stars fall into) from the VIPS.
If you’re a Radio-Free Carmela fan (and really, how could you not be after you see from the photo how cute she is? Don’t be fooled, though. She’s also pretty fierce. And I mean that in the most awesome way possible…), here’s the skinny on the gig that she was talking about, as well as our other upcoming gigs.
Thursday June 23
(w/ The SoulCommittee, and All Together Now)
Click here for more information.
Friday June 24
The Hideaway Café
St. Pete, FL
Saturday June 25
WSLR Sarasota Community Radio
$5 in advance | $7 at door
(w/ Radio-Free Carmela and The Transmitters)
From the Heart Music Hour – July 8
I don’t know if you saw my interview on WFSU last week (I didn’t, because I was in Colorado), but just in case you didn’t, it was touting this news:
Last Fall, we were able to be a part of the From the Heart Music Hour. We’re super-excited that we’ve been asked to again take part. From the Heart will appear on WFSU TV a few months down the road, but the live taping of the show will be at the Monticello Opera House on July 8th and 9th. The Sarah Mac Band will be playing on July 8. Don’t miss out on this wonderful evening of music in a BEAUTIFUL historic theatre.
Get tickets and more information now – click HERE.
And if I don’t mention this, Claire will kick me out of the band and somehow find a way to keep my name without paying any royalties…
Yes folks, we FINALLY ordered new Sarah Mac Band Single Revolution shirts! We have been sold out for a while, but they’re back. For all of you who have been asking – NOW is the time to order one before we sell out again!
OR email Claire to reserve yours. firstname.lastname@example.org
If you’re still reading this… you’re a trooper and I salute you. Keep checking back (or subscribe to our blog—see above) to get the debrief on my wonderful, make-my-heart-beat-out-of-my-chest-and-not-because-of-the-altitude trip to Telluride and the recap of our shows this weekend.